Gratitude Tour: A Joyous Beginning To Retirement

What a pleasure it has been, my gratitude tour, an idea that popped into my head one afternoon in May 2025 as my career in teaching was coming to an end.  As right as it felt to put away my Shakespeare anthology and unplug my smart board, I wasn’t sure how my immediate future would look.  I had multiple reasons outside the teaching profession to feel needed, but education had provided me a big ole heap of relevance for a long time.  I’ll admit I was nervous.

I’d just finished reading Chick Donohue’s The Greatest Beer Run Ever.  It’s not about teaching, but it is about going to great lengths to express gratitude.  Chick cleverly and bravely made his way to the front lines in Vietnam to say thank you to friends from his New York borough.  I’d use my little blue Kia to transport me down somewhat less dangerous backroads, highways and interstates to show my appreciation face-to-face and deliver tokens of gratitude.  

I’d also just received a copy of Blue Ridge School’s 2023-2024 yearbook.  To my surprise, it was dedicated to me!  Big thanks to Dedra Demaree and her yearbook staff for orchestrating that.  I was in tears as I read kind words written by fellow teachers and students.  They thanked me.  They let me know that my efforts had not gone unnoticed.  But my heart told me that they were the ones who deserved the praise.  Their examples, hard work, and successes kept me in a profession I’d not planned to enter.  

I made a decision that day that has proven to be a joyous beginning to retirement.  I would express my gratitude to those colleagues who’d had a lasting impact on me over the past forty-three years.  Not only them but former students, high school classmates, heads of school, and even my brother, all who have changed the lives of young people through their teaching.  I drove to Tennessee, Georgia, North Carolina, Virginia, Maryland, Indiana, and Wisconsin (with a promise to visit one more in California) to spend an afternoon or evening with these inspirational educators.  It has been an adventure well worth my time, a journey for which I’ll always be thankful.   

My tour began where I knew it had to begin, the only place that made sense for it to begin, with Shirley Underwood.  I was in Knoxville in July 2025 for my 50^th high school reunion.  Though social media allowed us to be in touch, I hadn’t seen Shirley in forty-six years.  That moment at Panera Bread is one I’ll cherish forever.  We embraced longer than was socially acceptable but not long enough to express my love for her.  We cried.  We laughed.  We reminisced.  Our two hours together were great for our souls.  The writing of my tribute to her has given us many opportunities to be in touch, and it has put a much-deserved spotlight on a person who changed the trajectory of my life. 

I knew I would meet with high school classmates Sheila Ray and Bob O’Connor that same day at Panera.  The three of us have from time to time over the years shared stories of our careers in teaching.  Their commitment to the profession had always been an inspiration to me.  What I did not expect was their reminding me that a high percentage of other South High School classmates entered the teaching profession and that I should meet with a few of them as well while in town.  

I did.  I was delighted to include Kelly Chung, Mary Richardson, and Robert Pelle. It was such a joy to learn more about their careers.  Their mentors were my mentors, too.  It speaks volumes to the quality of teaching we received at that small neighborhood high school in South Knoxville that so many of us chose the teaching profession.

As I made my list of whom I’d visit outside my hometown, my excitement grew.  I hoped to represent each of the seven schools in which I taught.  At that same moment, I realized that many of those who impacted me were not classroom teachers. Still, they were every bit as deserving to be included in my Gratitude Tour.

My trip back through Tennessee to Atlanta, GA, was one I’ll never forget.  It gave me the opportunity to visit my sister Cindy and her husband Brian.  It also gave me a chance to say hello to two recent Blue Ridge School graduates Will Scipio and Casper Corsello as well as another high school friend Michael Seeley.  Seeing family and friends to whom I wasn’t paying tribute but who still mattered very much to me proved to be a delightful bonus during my tour.  

I first visited Diane Haertel in Atlanta.  No one from the ’80s through the early 2000s represented the heart of Marist School better than did Diane.  I hoped to see The Most Reverend Joel M. Konzen, too.  He was the second of several heads of school who took a chance on me.  We had not been in touch since I left Atlanta in 1985.  Would he even remember me after forty years?  Our visit at the Archdiocese of Atlanta was a delight.  He was the same gracious, generous gentleman I recall as the leader of Marist in the ’80s.  He did remember me.  

Visits back to Charlottesville and to Blue Ridge School in St. George, VA, would not be so difficult.  I knew I wanted to celebrate someone very new to the profession, a young man who had a lasting impact on me in my final year at Blue Ridge.  Simon Curry was surprised and humbled that I wanted to write about him, but he spilled his heart about why he had chosen education over other more lucrative professions.  Society needs to cultivate more Simon Curry’s so that the field of education remains on solid ground.  

During that visit, I also met with Rob Murphy, the best boss I ever had and a non-classroom teacher who mattered a great deal to the young men at Blue Ridge School.  I had to include Carl and Nancy Frye, too, a power couple during their years at Blue Ridge, who have contributed to the lives of so many young people.  My head of school during my last twelve years at Blue Ridge was Trip Darrin.  He deserved a visit and recognition for keeping me and many other educators in the game during the Covid years.    

My next stop was Virginia Beach where I had the opportunity to have dinner on the same evening with two mentors from different schools – Peter Holland from Blue Ridge and Rob Hershey from Durham Academy.  The small-world story is that Peter and Rob grew up together in Virginia Beach.  And such a coincidence that they both had a profound impact on my career.

Then to Durham, NC.  I had been blessed to watch Libby Lang grow from a young girl challenged with learning differences into a successful college student to eventually become one of Durham Academy’s most impactful teachers.  She was high on my list as she is a success story born from absolute grit and tenacity.  

I couldn’t leave Durham without saying hello to Steve and Teresa Engebretsen, dear friends and former colleagues, who served Durham Academy for a combined eighty-eight years.  My good friend Chuck Roser more than deserved a visit and recognition as well for the way he nurtured not only his students but his colleagues. 

One young man from Durham Academy who I remembered as a student of mine, but who couldn’t have been, is Torsie Judkins.  I knew he was in Madison, WI, which is only a few hours beyond West Lafayette, IN, where my brother Buster would be waiting for me.  That proved to be twenty-eight hours of driving over three days.  Every minute was worth it as I thanked two career educators face to face.  Torsie represents as well as anyone the importance of increasing diversity in our schools.  Buster is an inspiration for the ways in which he has reinvented himself to inspire future computer programmers as that technology continues to evolve at a rapid pace.

Tony Brown and I arrived on the Blue Ridge campus the same year, and I knew I’d eventually catch up with him one-on-one during a return trip to Charlottesville.  Tony is a unicorn in the number of years he has given to disciplining young men in such a way that they maintain their dignity.  

Though Dolores DeAngelis now lives in California, a drive I haven’t made yet, we were able to FaceTime and otherwise correspond as she shared a lifetime of stories about how she and husband Frank impacted education.  Dolores wanted to demonstrate through music that a diverse world could have one voice.  She has done that.  I deliberately saved their tribute as my finale (for now).  

In my final year of teaching, I met many dedicated teachers at St. Anne’s School of Annapolis.  I grew particularly close to Christiana Harris, with whom I shared a teaching space.  She reminded me that a genuine caring for others and a wicked sense of humor are essential to success in education.  Skip Holmes was my classroom next-door neighbor at St. Anne’s.  I admired his down-to-earth approach to teaching math, and I truly appreciated his frequent encouragement on days when I should have known what I was doing but didn’t.  They were local and therefore did not require a road trip (other than using I 97, a speedway that runs between Millersville and Annapolis).  

Former Blue Ridge student William Scipio was also close by in Baltimore.  My relationship with William is among the most precious ones I developed as a teacher.  He came from such humble beginnings and now gives back in multiple ways to the city he loves.  When his son Will also attended Blue Ridge, William insisted I be his son’s advisor as well as English teacher.  I see Will, too, from time to time (as I did in Atlanta) when he’s on a break from college.   

I will be forever grateful to Franchesca Warren and Cheryl Adams with The Educator’s Room for agreeing to publish each of my tributes as well as my introduction and whatever one might call this piece.  A conclusion?  An outro or coda?  It’s more of a pause, though.  Just a pause, like a needed comma in a long train of positive thought. 

Franchesca and Cheryl have helped me shine a light on professionals who do not receive adequate compensation nor enough public recognition for inspiring other human beings to live their dreams.  I also want to thank Luna Greenstein, Content Editor for Independent School magazine, for her article about my Gratitude Tour in the summer 2026 edition.  Her story allowed me to point additional readers to my tributes in The Educator’s Room. 

One of the requests I made to each of those I visited was to name two or three mentors they’d visit on their own gratitude tours, and why.  Thus began a beautiful ripple effect of appreciation.  By the time I had visited and written about my twenty-sixth dear friend, I was able to celebrate three times that many educators.  

It has been an experience I would recommend to any newly-retired educator.  The feelings of mutual love and respect have been in abundance.  Everyone to whom I’ve mentioned the tour has thought it is a great idea to honor educators in this very public way.  Everyone I contacted was humbled, honored, and very happy to have me visit, then humbled again (sometimes to the point of discomfort) as I sang their praises publicly in prose.  

I took advantage of the opportunity to post links to my tributes in Facebook, Instagram and LinkedIn.  This led to even more ripple effects of gratitude.  Those who read my stories remembered the life-changing effects that these and other educators had on their lives.  This was exactly what I hoped to accomplish with my visits and my writing.

I do have a few regrets.  

Not all seven of my schools are represented.  I’m embarrassed that I could not think of even one teacher or student from my one year at Gordon High School in DeKalb County, GA, to visit.  I was obviously still so new to teaching at that point that I focused too much on instruction and not enough on developing relationships.  

Free Union Country School in Free Union, VA, is also not represented.  I simply have failed to pull a tribute together at this point, but there is a former head and several former colleagues from that “little school that could” who should be represented in my Gratitude Tour.  My experience at Free Union remains one of the most important stops in my career.  

I was sad, too, that several dear friends I would have loved to visit are no longer with us.  My beloved former Carter High School student Joe Stiles left this world way too soon.  And it would have been so meaningful to have one more conversation with Father Frank Kissel from Marist School.  What I would give for one more laugh-filled afternoon with Mary Clyde Bugg from Durham Academy.  I would cherish the chance to sit down one more time with Ed McFarlane and Frank DeAngelis, the gentlemen who saw something in me I didn’t see in myself that fateful day in 1998 on the Blue Ridge School campus.  I also owe a face-to-face thank-you to Blue Ridge colleagues Jim Niederberger and Peter Cole, renowned teachers who sadly died before they were able to enjoy even one day of retirement.  I’m convinced that I’ll have the opportunity to see each one of these mentors again.  They are reminders that we need to show our gratitude for others in the moment and every chance we get.  

I will be forever grateful to those who welcomed my visits and made my passion project a reality.  During my visits, we remembered what we’d meant to one another, what we still mean to one another, and the difference we made to young people.  From that came stories of why they deserve public praise, and they were quick to praise other educators.  The tour and the subsequent celebration of dear friends have been a sheer delight.

And, so, this pause.  I’ve accomplished my goal.  I hope I’ve spread some joy in a world that I believe sometimes settles for bickering rather than looking for reasons to be kind.  As we continue to address a multitude of concerns in our society, educators need to pat one another on the back for a job well done.  

Being a public school and independent school teacher is more challenging than ever for reasons too numerous to mention here.  Let’s not pretend we aren’t aware of these issues, and let’s praise those who are navigating those complicated waters as they continue to help young people unlock their full potential.  Nurturing and encouraging students are two shared qualities that keep teachers in the profession in the face of so many challenges.  They should also nurture and encourage one another.  Say thank you.  Teachers love it when students and their parents show appreciation.  Hearing it from a colleague, take it from me, also feels incredible.  

More public recognition might also make the teaching profession more attractive.  Sure, teachers tend to be humble types, but they deserve at least the same amount of attention in social media as professional athletes, actors, actresses, doctors, lawyers and politicians.  No successful person in those fields or in any field has found that success without feeling the love from several teachers.  

As seasoned teachers retire, who will take their spots?  Why would a young person considering various professions want to enter the field of education?  While I’m the first to admit that many of my mentors are irreplaceable, I also know that we desperately need inspirational young teachers such as Libby Lang, William Scipio, and Simon Curry, as well as trend-setting young leaders such as Torsie Judkins, to feel valued in the teaching profession.

I hope that my gestures of gratitude might in some small way encourage the next generation of instructors.  Society needs your talents and kind hearts more than ever.